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Life is much easier in a family when there is a spirit of cooperation. Cooperation has been defined as a willingness to develop and live by the consensus of a family or group. There are basic principles and ideas that can help instill within your child a desire to cooperate. Many families function in a highly fast paced environment and the opportunities that many children have today to play meaningful roles within their family are fewer than ever before. Children need a sense of having a meaningful part in the functioning of their family. They need to feel a spirit of cooperation. Here are some ideas that will help.
Effort needs to be made so that the child feels like he is contributing to the betterment and welfare of the family. Whenever possible, include children in family decisions. All people have a desire to feel worthwhile and important. Nobody wants to be told what to do all of the time. Children love to help plan, organize, and carry out family decisions.
Family counsels are a wonderful way to accomplish family planning. A family counsel is a time when the entire family gets together to plan, express feelings and ideas, and express appropriate concerns. The timing of counsels is crucial. They need to be at a time when emotions are not high and family members are well rested. It needs to be a time for peaceful talk.
Brainstorming sessions are fun at family counsels. During a brainstorming session everyone gives as many ideas as they can to help plan events or solve problems. Then decide the limits that need to be placed on the decision such as money, time, distance, and safety. Evaluate the ideas based on the limits set and come to an agreement.
A child needs to have an assignment or responsibility in carrying out the family decisions. A child will be happier knowing that he contributed to the success of a family decision. Every child must feel that he is necessary to the success of family projects. A child needs to feel that he is able to accomplish and help, that he is important, and that he is connected to his family.
As children see parents listening and counseling with them, they will desire to be part of the family “team”. They will learn to listen to other people’s ideas and concerns and they will learn to compromise. Including children in family planning can begin when they are very young. Children much more readily accept family rules when they feel that they have had a part in deciding what those rules are.
Respect a child’s opinions and feelings. Help the child feel like his opinions counts even when a decision other than his is decided. Give a child time to express his feelings. In the rush of life, we need to take time to listen to the child. A child likes to understand why things are happening. An extra few minutes may be all the child needs to get him to cooperate.
Don’t forget to praise your child when you see him putting forth an effort to cooperate. Showing that you appreciate your child may be the most important part in getting him to cooperate. Cooperation takes an effort on each person’s part. Working together can be fun. Happy cooperating!
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